I am a meme virgin, people…

Yep, this is my first meme ever. I was tagged by Jessi over at Elsie Elsewhere, so I guess I owe my deflowering to her. Here goes:

7 x 7

7 Things I Want To Do Without Dying of Embarrassment

1. Wear heels.

2. Go sleeveless.

3. Call a doctor’s office and explain my health problem to the gatekeeper who answers the phone.

4. Rock climb (the idea that the person on belay is forced to stare at my butt while I’m shimmying up a sheer rock face convinces me that I would fall).

5. Speak French when visiting Paris.

6. Play guitar.

7. Start a blog.

7 Things I Cannot Do in the Summer

1. Walk the dogs on the trails at the ranch (re: snakes).

2. Work in the flower garden (see #1). (I do all my gardening in the winter.)

3. Buy Christmas presents (I can’t buy Xmas presents until December–it just doesn’t seem festive enough.)

4. Skip shaving.

5. Wear my favorite long, black, wool coat that has a metallic thread woven through it.

6. Make yummy winter squash soups.

7. Curl up in front of the fire.

7 Things I Can Do Which Are Meaningless Unless You Are Still in Jr. High

1. Do a backflip in the swimming pool.

2. Curl my tongue (the recessive gene way).

3. Recite Miss Mary Black, Black, Black…All Down Your Back, Back, Back.

4. Lick the flavored lip gloss straight out of the tube.

5. Skateboard.

6. French braid hair.

7. Wonder if you’ll still like me if I really say what I think about something.

7 Things Which Attracted Me to My House

1. Sits at the foot of Black Mountain, an ancient volcano that looks like the Scottish highlands.

2. 20 miles from town, so we have the feeling like we’re leaving the bullshit behind.

3. Trails lead to shrines that the former owners built.

4. Room for more dogs.

5. Fireplace.

6. Swimming hole.

7. Space for gardens.

7 Things I Say Most When I’m Crying

1. This is the part in the movie I always lose it.

2. I hate this.

3. This sucks.

4. I’m sorry.

5. I’m just tired.

6. I’m such a sucker for animals.

7. [Silence]–because mostly I am trying to hide the fact I’m crying when I’m crying.

7 Children’s Books I Am Adding to My Own Collection(I don’t have children, so this list is really based on my own nostaglia)

1. any of the Nancy Drew books (I wanted to be a detective when I grew up.)

2. Hailstones and Halibut Bones (A wonderful book, in which each color is turned into a poem. The title is a line from the “white poem.” I’m sure this book has something to do with the fact that I’m a poet today.)

3. The Big Tidy-Up (I drove my mother crazy reciting this by heart. It’s now out-of-print and costs $299.95!!! Good grief!)

4. Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIHM

5. The Plant Sitter (This is sort of a friendlier version of Where the Wild Things Are, or at least the dream I’d prefer to have….)

6. The Story of Sacajawea (out-of-print)

7. Free To Be You and Me (I listened to this album endlessly as a kid, although it’s also a book)

7 Children’s Movies I Can Watch for the Bazillionth Time Without Wanting to Rip My Eyes from Their Sockets

1. Charlotte’s Web (absolutely, positively, guaranteed to make me cry)

2. My Dog Skip (ditto to the comment on #1)

3. A Charlie Brown Christmas (Don’t tell me it’s a TV special, not a movie. The sad lost tree that almost doesn’t find a home is a killer.)

4. The Sound of Music

5. How the Grinch Stole Christmas (the original, animated Chuck Jones/Boris Karloff TV version, not the bogus Jim Carey makeover)

6. The Wizard of Oz

7. Old Yeller

So, I nominate Snow Monkey and Walternatives as “IT.” Consider yourselves tagged.