The Refusnik…
or, as R. has become fond of saying, “our little dissident.” It is Thursday morning (see other post below for info on Tuesday and Wednesday), and The Bee is still refusing to drink. She is clearly hungry–she perks up and signs “yes” when I ask her if she wants (rice) milk; I take her arm splints off, she grabs the bottle and takes a swig–only to burst into violent tears and thrashes. She is having trouble accepting her new mouth, I’m sure it feels very scary to her, and she has dug in in her stubborn way and refuses to acknowledge it. So, nothing shall pass those lips.
Did I mention my girl had opinions?
I don’t know what will happen if she continues to refuse…she signs that she wants to go home, but the doctor won’t let her go until she’s drinking well. She has no fever, no blood, her vitals are all great–the healing is progressing in her mouth without her. She is obviously enraged that we made the decision to change her mouth and has decided to deny it.
We thought we had a breakthrough this morning, when we played the “Cheers!” game with her–(thanks be to God, J., and E., for teaching The Bee about “cheers!”)–and insisted that after you do “cheers!”, you have to drink. She took a swig and promptly burst into tears and full body lunges.
So, that’s all I’ve got. I may be looking at yet another night on the cot unless we figure out a way to break the spell.
Oh sweetie, I hope she drinks for you soon. Another night on the cot sounds tremendously sucky. (I got to spend the night on a broken recliner when I. had her surgery. Fun.)
Hopefully the need to be home will overrule her need to be a dissident when it comes to drinking.
Sending major drinking vibes your way…and a “cheers” from E..
Comment by: Jessi - 09.06.2007 - 8.55 am
Oh, I’m so sorry to hear this, SBird. I’ll keep sending positive thoughts you way, hoping hoping hoping that the spell is broken and that the Bee will be drinking soon, knowing that is her magic ticket home. Love to you all, and best wishes for your team at the hospital, too.
Comment by: walternatives - 09.06.2007 - 9.07 am
Thinking about you guys and hoping that your little firecracker changes her mind about things soon. Poor baby. Take care.
Comment by: Carolyn - 09.06.2007 - 9.20 am
Happy to read the surgeries went so well,hoping the drinking has commenced by the time you read this….actually,I hope you are home by the time you read this.
Comment by: barbara noblog - 09.06.2007 - 9.49 am
Wishing the Bee a speedy realization that her recently violated mouth comes with new special powers…
And “cheers!”
Comment by: atomic mama - 09.06.2007 - 10.00 am
Poor kid, and mom too. Are they really only allowing her to drink formula/milk? Can you go to the cafeteria or even home and get something that she would like to drink like a yogurt drink or Gatorade or even ginger ale, and then give it to her in a cup? My daughter was 4 when she had palate surgery. They brought her broth which I put into a cup for her to drink, jello, which I fed her by hand (they gave me a spoon but I knew better than to use it), and juice, which she drank from the cup. Once we were home, the blender was our best friend. Blended noodle soup and broccoli soup were popular, as well as blended hamburger (just add beef broth and ketchup), blended chicken and rice (add chicken broth), yogurt drink, jello, ice cream on a cone (she stopped when she got to the cone), etc. Your lordship sounds like a total jerk; ours is so conservative that he enforced the liquids only for 3 weeks! Good luck. I hope you’re in your own beds tonight.
Comment by: Donna - 09.06.2007 - 10.29 am
Oooooh, Honey! (Or should I say Honeys because I’m thinking of the Bee, too). I’m so glad that the surgery went well - that Emme Lu will be able to avoid future surgeries! That’s such great news! But I’m so sorry that you’re still there (though I hope that by the time you read this you’re not) and that Emme Lu is stretching her political protest muscles!
You are keeping an amazing sense of humor and patience in all of this - I think I might be pulling my hair out. Poor little pumpkin! So hard to imagine just WHAT she thinks is happening. Here’s hoping that she gets something down today! Cheers, indeed! Thanks for updating!
Comment by: Maia - 09.06.2007 - 11.18 am
My heart just broke a little at The Bee bursting into tears after taking a drink. Sending every good drink vibe I’ve got out your way……
Comment by: Jacquie - 09.06.2007 - 6.23 pm
While I feel terrible for her, and for you, I am smirking thinking, that-a-girl. No shrinking violet in her!
The withdrawing into herself scared me but, shes a strong one. I promice, this will pass, the healing will pass, the adjustment will pass.
Thank goodness it was all done at once. Poor thing, it probably hurts a lot too.
Amazing how ignorant well educated people can be. Try hard not to hurt them, they probably havent slept in weeks.
Comment by: Anotheramy - 09.06.2007 - 6.30 pm
Poor little baby!
Comment by: christie - 09.06.2007 - 7.59 pm
I’m thinking of you.
Comment by: Journeywoman - 09.06.2007 - 8.33 pm
Firstly - can I just say how wonderful it is that you helped teach ELu so many signs so she can communicate with you. You rock…as does she with her large vocab. Does she know any feeling words? Like mad! Hurt! Angry! It would be great if she could find a way to express her emotions as it seems (from what you wrote) she is acting them out with her behavior.
I am very sure that she will learn what she needs to do to get herself home very soon. She loves her sweet wee ranch home & will soon put 2+2 together to make the best choice. She is a future rocket scientist, right? Does the hospital have a social worker or any resources for kids having this surgery? Sometimes there are books that help “explain” what is going on for kids.
Sorry, the last idea is prob. coming along quite a bit late…
Thinking about you guys. No matter what, I am certain that this will pass - and soon. Although I can only imagine what an eternity it must feel like for you tonight. XO
Comment by: wzgirl - 09.06.2007 - 8.50 pm
Oh, poor baby! I agree with wzgirl–The Bee is one smart chickie and will put 2 plus 2 together. Just keep telling her she needs to be drinking before the Mean Lordly Doctors will allow her to go home. Give her lots of snuggles and hugs and try jello. Sending lots of “hang in there” vibes…
Comment by: OmegaMom - 09.06.2007 - 11.54 pm