Thank you
for the support and perspective, re: Dude and the mirror. Sometimes, when you live in a hole like I do, you wonder if your take on something is appropriate or accurate. I am sort of uber-private, too. I hate people I don’t know in my house, knocking on my door, in my driveway, etc., so Dude sort of pushed all sorts of buttons just by his very presence.* I get this hypersensitivity to unknown folks from my father, who refused to answer our door growing up, unless he was expecting someone. I guess the ethic of inviting a stranger to dinner is one that’s going to be lost on me–although I like it, in principle.
By the way, Dude IS the boss, the supervisor. He OWNS the appraisal company that the bank contracted with. But going to the bank and reporting our experience with him is a good idea, and one that I’ll pursue, as soon as we get a favorable appraisal. I don’t think I even mentioned yesterday that he *forgot*–or *overlooked*–pulling one of our plats. So, he didn’t even have an accurate sense of the property until R. pointed it out to him. GAH.
More later.
*Although it’s interesting, in light of my uber-privacy IRL, that I am one of the more public blogs that I read. Hmmmmmm…anybody want to psychoanalyze that? I’ve always attributed my lack of anxiety about stalkers to the fact that we live in the middle of nowhere, past a locked gate, a long driveway, a guard dog, and a gun (well, it IS the West, ya know…).
You are SO like me, in the ultra private respect!
Even someone parked outside our house, sends waves of intrusion though my psyche. Rationally, I can see what I’m doing - but emotionally, can’t seem to help myself.
Some people, such as “Dude”, don’t even grasp that they are intruding in other’s “space”. But to break something, that belongs to someone else and just walk away? I don’t understand that at all.
Yep. It would of rocked my world too.
Comment by: holly - 09.14.2007 - 10.31 am
Oh absolutely - I’m totally with you on this. Another total hermit here. I am just waiting for the day when I can buy our 100 acres with a gate and a private road etc. It’s part of the reason I keep big dogs, and it’s definitely the reason we built a big privacy fence. I am perfectly happy to be social - but I must have warning! I HATE it when someone knocks on my door that I’m not expecting. I have told all my friends time and time again that I can’t handle neighborly drop ins. That they MUST call first. I want at least a day to prepare for visitors. This attitude has become harder and harder to maintain as Spike has aged,though, because all of the sudden there are spur of the moment, child planned, playdates etc. and I really do admire the other moms who are flexible enough to have people in and out and not care what state their house is in (I notice that people with more than two kids are the most likely to be like this) but it still totally freaks me out.
As to why you keep a public blog? That’s easy. You’re isolated, and you like your privacy, but you still need to connect with a greater community. A blog is a totally controlled way to feel like you’re supported - that you’re being heard - without having to sacrifice your physical isolation. Plus, you’re a writer - and I know that I often feel like if I don’t document what’s happening in my life - it hasn’t really happened. Writers need an audience. It all makes perfect sense to me.
Comment by: Maia - 09.14.2007 - 11.06 am
Un-announced guests? Freak.me.out.completely….seriously. I am not comfortable, I can feel the anxiety building, and just hate it.
Strangely, my job requires me to be open and spur of the moment, and I have no issues with it.
Anxious to hear how it goes once you do report his behavior.
Comment by: Amanda - 09.14.2007 - 12.05 pm
This is fascinating. I don’t mind unannounced guests too much, but I understand.
What Maia wrote about the public blog and need to write and that if it hasn’t been documented it hasn’t happened. OMG - that’s me!
Comment by: Cavatica - 09.14.2007 - 1.43 pm